Wednesday, December 28, 2016

2016 For Me.

January saw me recovering from my second laparoscopy. I was still in recovery when I forced myself onstage for a Mon Cherie Entertainment Show at the Backstage Bistro. I covered up my glued together puncture wounds with stickers, and had Totalie onstage with me in case I fell over, or gave him the "get me the hell offstage" sign. I was so happy to be in my bed after that, but it was worth it because a few more people became aware of The Trulie Awesome Show.

The Trulie Awesome Show continued it's performances at the Ooh La Las Varietease Show until December of this year, when it was canceled by the producers of The Ooh La Las portion, due to their lack of people in their half. I wasn't happy about all the work we and the Sick World of Dr. Show did, being shoved in the garbage without any discussion (in fact it was put to us that there would be no discussion) but there wasn't anything to be done about it except sit in my room and watch music videos from the 90's until it was time to perform with ElectroCult Circus that night.

I performed at several Mon Cherie Entertainment gigs at the Shrunken Head throughout the year as well. I really enjoyed bringing out new material at these shows. I did a little bit of work with The Sick World of Dr. Show and I performed at a few Bossy Grrl's Shows too so it was a very packed schedule heading into the summer.

February and March I took time to build all of my old costumes, and worked with Taryn Lindsey to record my numbers so I had them for keepsake. It was a ton of work. Building all those costumes and then performing them one after the other was a bigger undertaking than I thought it would be. We got all of the signature numbers down which was good.

In April we did a 24 hour stream (which Totalie forgot to pull off of Twitch so we lost all of that footage dang it!) We had some people on to make crafts for DRAUMA and read stories and play games. It was kind of a mess but most things I do are.

In May I competed in the BurlyPicks Competition and won first place. I was so shocked I won. Really. The entire time waiting for the National Competition portion was just so surreal. I couldn't believe it was happening, and I had no idea what I was doing...which usually I don't, but in this case I felt like I should. That was one of the happiest performance days of my life. DRAUMA was a disaster for me. Most of the costumes fell apart before they hit the stage, and I am pretty sure my models were going to revolt. I got them ready to be onstage at the time we were supposed to be ready, but the show was running behind and we didn't know that. So everyone was making their way up the stairs (which is when things started to break because steps and paper clothing don't mix) about 30 minutes before they had to be. Then they had to stand there and wait. And these were not comfortable things to wear. After this show fell apart on me, I vowed I wouldn't do this to myself or anyone else again. If I do a big show, I have to do it where I can build the items in the venue and not have to transport them. AND NO STAIRS. Button got some good stuff out of DRAUMA though. Someone hired her to make a mask like she made for the show, and she did a photo shoot in some of the costume pieces so at least someone got something out of it! I think I just aged a few years and felt shitty for a few weeks.

June we did Origins which was more fun than the year before. We got to go to more of the panels and we had time to hang out with the other volunteers. We also did the Columbus Arts Fest for two days which was sweaty but really fun. It was a huge stage and the staff was awesome. And Comfest which was hilarious because when Totalie was testing the sound, it was turned all the way up and a giant fart scared everyone at Comfest. Yep that was us. Sorry.

July we did the DooDah Parade which is my favorite parade of the whole year. Up to this point, we had 19 ElectroCult Circus shows under our belt as well.

August was GenCon which was so much fun and full of classes and shows and adventures.

September was the BurlyPicks Nationals. I had a fantastic time in Pittsburgh and I won Most Innovative which was another shock. I didn't even know that was a category. Another happiest day. Plus ECC got to play at The Rex, which I had been trying to make happen for two years. September also started my Heels of Horror Rehearsals so it was a very good September.

October was Performance Art Day and Heels of Horror. Both totally new and unique experiences to me that kind of kicked my butt in a very good way.

November was our last Varietease Show (unbeknownst to us at the time) and my last Girls Gags and Giggles of the year. We also got to do a Creative Mornings event which is like TED talks but oh so early in the morning. We got paid in bananas. I found a blip of us at the event on their website, but they cut out everything I said which I think was something like "There's art and theater and drag and burlesque and music and all kinds of things to do in Columbus" to "and music and all kinds of things to do in Columbus" or something like that. Marking the second time this year I was basically bleeped out. (CD102.5 bleeped out my "suck it" on an ECC song)

December was mostly ElectroCult Circus gigs since our TAS gig was canceled, so the year wound down pretty quickly.

Personally 2016 was a jam packed year with some very cool things happening so, while most people want the year to burn, I was okay with this year. I learned a lot about myself.

Friday, December 2, 2016

Doll Face

Set phase to manic!!!!

 I could not sleep last night so I was looking at Rainbow Brite dolls (omg remember PJ Sparkles!?) and looking through my camera roll at 2am.

I found the face swap I did with a Blythe doll, and it made me giggle because once in a while I'm called doll face, which is supposed to be a cute little pet name, but since I'm uncomfortable with happy squishy feelings, I turned it into a nightmare.

I do think it's a cute pet name. But let's talk doll faces for a minute. No wait, let's talk about pet names. Why is it "pet names" pets are usually named Bunny Face or Mr. Dog Breath. Okay so doll faces used to be all about chunky cheeks when I was a kid. Maybe to look like a cherub? Now they have giant eyes and are trending toward giant lips. I hope someday it's all about the giant feet like my Jem doll was, because it's harder to lose the shoes.

Was that a minute?

Yep. Manic. WOOT!

Thursday, December 1, 2016

Performance Art Day October 2016 Wild Goose Creative

Wild Goose Creative hosted a second Performance Art Day back and October. They gave me a chance to start my project I'm Afraid of You. I wanted to challenge myself to sit in front of strangers and make eye contact and talk. I have trouble with this on a regular basis. I have had more than one conversation with people who thought I was very mean and stuck up when they first met me, because I was so quiet and aloof. It's shyness really. My mother had the exact same experience growing up. I also usually have a pretty intense look on my face which makes me unapproachable.

There were a few artists who were doing their projects all day and I was one of them. I sat at a cardboard kiosk and waited for people to sit and talk. I went with no wig and no costume so that I didn't have my armor on. I had to be honest and tell people exactly why I would be afraid to talk to them. I wasn't surprised that mostly it had to do with my own insecurity.

The idea was to talk to people but it did get loud in the room, so eventually it turned into writing back and forth. (Spelling was an issue here which doubled the anxiety!) I kept the notes and am letting them turn into other projects like this one.

The most interesting thing was, that by the end of the day, my head was pounding and I felt completely drained. It took me an entire day to feel close to my normal self again. It's difficult for me to explain, but it was almost as if all of the energy I absorb all day was too much to take. Everyone was wonderful and it was a fantastic day, but I don't normally like crowds and interacting with people is intense for me, so an entire day of it may have been pushing it. I just feel like if I give into that weakness I will have a smaller world that limits me, and I don't want that.

Safety is an illusion and so is control.