Doll Face

Set phase to manic!!!!

 I could not sleep last night so I was looking at Rainbow Brite dolls (omg remember PJ Sparkles!?) and looking through my camera roll at 2am.

I found the face swap I did with a Blythe doll, and it made me giggle because once in a while I'm called doll face, which is supposed to be a cute little pet name, but since I'm uncomfortable with happy squishy feelings, I turned it into a nightmare.

I do think it's a cute pet name. But let's talk doll faces for a minute. No wait, let's talk about pet names. Why is it "pet names" pets are usually named Bunny Face or Mr. Dog Breath. Okay so doll faces used to be all about chunky cheeks when I was a kid. Maybe to look like a cherub? Now they have giant eyes and are trending toward giant lips. I hope someday it's all about the giant feet like my Jem doll was, because it's harder to lose the shoes.

Was that a minute?

Yep. Manic. WOOT!

Performance Art Day October 2016 Wild Goose Creative

Wild Goose Creative hosted a second Performance Art Day back and October. They gave me a chance to start my project I'm Afraid of You. I wanted to challenge myself to sit in front of strangers and make eye contact and talk. I have trouble with this on a regular basis. I have had more than one conversation with people who thought I was very mean and stuck up when they first met me, because I was so quiet and aloof. It's shyness really. My mother had the exact same experience growing up. I also usually have a pretty intense look on my face which makes me unapproachable.

There were a few artists who were doing their projects all day and I was one of them. I sat at a cardboard kiosk and waited for people to sit and talk. I went with no wig and no costume so that I didn't have my armor on. I had to be honest and tell people exactly why I would be afraid to talk to them. I wasn't surprised that mostly it had to do with my own insecurity.

The idea was to talk to people but it did get loud in the room, so eventually it turned into writing back and forth. (Spelling was an issue here which doubled the anxiety!) I kept the notes and am letting them turn into other projects like this one.

The most interesting thing was, that by the end of the day, my head was pounding and I felt completely drained. It took me an entire day to feel close to my normal self again. It's difficult for me to explain, but it was almost as if all of the energy I absorb all day was too much to take. Everyone was wonderful and it was a fantastic day, but I don't normally like crowds and interacting with people is intense for me, so an entire day of it may have been pushing it. I just feel like if I give into that weakness I will have a smaller world that limits me, and I don't want that.

Safety is an illusion and so is control. 

Where do Hecklers Come From?

They have probably been around since anyone decided to stand up and speak. Where there is one person talking, there's usually another who wants to do the same.

People talking back to the performers onstage can sometimes make the performance more amusing, most of the time they turn that well rehearsed and timed out routine into something that falls flat because no one could hear the punch line.

According to Wikipedia the term heckler comes from textiles. People who teased or combed out fibers. The word we use to describe the interrupting audience member, comes from Scotland where a group of the textile hecklers would debate the news. Pretty simple. One person reads and the others add commentary. It seems like a great way to pass the work day.

It's difficult to know what to do with a heckler. Standing on the stage, you aren't sure if they are only going to say what they just said and stop, or if it will continue. When it continues, all you can think about it this person taking what you've worked on, and what others came to see, and distorting it, controlling it so that it is now their performance. If you stop everything and address the person it can escalate. If you incorporate them into the performance it encourages them. Any way that it goes it's awkward for everyone.

The heckler is brave. They are sitting in a crowd, completely anonymous, and suddenly they make their presence known. All eyes turn from the stage, to this person. They single themselves out. They presumably want the attention. What is it that encourages them to say their own quips and commentary to more than just the person sitting beside them? It isn't that these particular people are the only ones to have thoughts and opinions during the performance. We all do. Some of us keep it to ourselves and discuss after. Some whisper to the person next to them. The rare few want the entire room to know.

You can't blame movies, television, and internet for hecklers because they existed long before people were entertained by recorded performances you could talk over or make smoothies during. I blame selfishness. The person sitting in the audience doesn't think beyond themselves to the people all around who came to see what is on the stage. They don't think about the performer and what they go through to create what they are presenting. The heckler only sees an opportunity for themselves and they take it.

Sometimes it works. Most times it doesn't. It is a problem that will always pop up and I've seen performers handle it beautifully but I've also seen situations where there's no choice but to kick the person out. By then it's hard to get the energy back up to overcome the negativity.

For the regular heckler, the occasional heckler, or first time hecklers:

1) Stop and think before you speak. That way the moment will pass and you wont have time to say anything.

2) If your mouth works more quickly than your brain, practice talking quietly so no one can hear you when you speak except the person next to you.

3) Each live performance is a unique. Just like you.

4) Thank you for coming to the show.

Clutter

Comfest is this weekend and I feel like cleaning.

It's usually when I am in the middle of a busy time that I suddenly feel that if I do not de-clutter my life I will explode. This time around it's even more than de-cluttering, we are talking about sorting through 14 years of living in the same place (give or take) and getting rid of most of it.

I collect ephemera and clothing. I try to get rid of things but always end up putting it in another box. Most of these things are memories and I don't want to get rid of them. I don't want to make them digital either because that's the same to me as sticking it in a box in a basement only I would never find it again. Part of the fun of cleaning is finding things you forgot that you had.

I really wish I could own my own place so I could wallpaper my walls with memories.

DRAUMA & Burlypicks 2016

Last weekend was DRAUMA 2016 and Burlypicks 2016 so it was a big weekend!

DRAUMA day I started packing the car with all of the costumes at about 8am. We arrived at the Bluestone and set up. Everything was going smoothly when I decided to change out the battery on Button's paper mache heart. I asked Totalie to toss me a battery and when I plugged it in, nothing happened. Usually it started to light up right away. Then I smelled electrical burning and realized the heart was smoking in my hands. "It's on fire!" I said and tossed it like a hot potato to Totalie "Get it out of here!" He was about to run out with it but he just unplugged it. The whole room was stinky, but it never flamed up so that was good. Here is where I throw in puns about heartburn and Totalie's new Hearts On Fire collection of jewelry. We still aren't sure why that happened. Luckily it didn't happen when she was wearing it.

We had some lights to put into the heart so it would still glow but it wasn't nearly as neat. We have to make last minute decisions like that a lot. For instance, my third monster needed to be redone after the 5pm rehearsal because it just wasn't working. I feel like I could have gotten it to work but I wasn't able to try it on the actors before that day. This piece involved two actors joined on the top of their body to form a monster. I wasn't going for conjoined twins I was just going for a wide monster. The headpiece and facemask needed more work and I just couldn't allow the actors on the stage in it because it wasn't safe. They were trying so hard but they couldn't see. I had two left over masks that I had made and I decided to use that instead and go for the two headed Trulie and Totalie monster. It's a cute concept that I want to expand on when I actually have some real time to put the costume together. Not bad for last minute though. The actors were good sports about it. (photos by Mr. Berry of mrberryphoto.com for DRAUMA)

It was a long night and by the time everyone was up on the steps waiting to go on, I think we had repaired four things that ripped. It's very crowded in the space we have to get ready and paper doesn't take stress sometimes. I am thankful for tape and all who had to use it to repair my stuff. I took my time on these things to make them sturdy. They were carted back and forth several times and lasted longer than they would have in the past but by the time it got to the show, some of the items had simply had enough. The backstage steps took their toll on most of the costumes. But we got some great photos from Mr. Berry!



I had a great cast and crew and the Rendezvous/Evolved folks running the event are fantastic!

Burlypicks Ohio Regional Competition was the following Saturday. We arrived early at the A&R Music Bar and set up. I had been nervous for days about this show. Competitions are so rough. You have to have some thick skin to get through them and keep going even if you lose. (Especially if you lose) They are like auditions. I've been to MANY and when they say an actor's life is 99% rejection they are not kidding. It's extra hard too, because no one wants to be friendly at auditions. Everyone eyes everyone else as "the enemy"  (this was not the case at Burlypicks everyone was friendly and supportive of each other, and that is how it should be! It's hard enough and we're all in this together!)

  I met a lot of new performers which is always fun. I watched all of the performances I could, and there are many amazingly talented and creative performers in Ohio. I still consider myself a rookie who has a ton to learn, so I was completely stunned when I took 1st place.

Dimples Diamond and Me, Trulie Scrumptious! Photo by Fever Blister

Ohio Burlypicks Regional Competition 2016 A&R Music Bar
 It was an incredible feeling that I have never gotten to experience before and I am going to treasure that moment for as long as I have a memory bank.  I still can't believe I have a medal on it that says "WINNER!" and I didn't buy it for myself as a gag! (I actually won it!!)

Burlypicks Finals are in Pittsburgh September 10th at the Rex Theater! Burlypicks FInals 2016

One and Done.

Yesterday was day one of the archival project with Taryn Lindsey Photography (Columbus Pin Up Studios). It took two hours to record 6 numbers with only one re-do.   I think it went pretty well, and some of the images I got to preview looked amazing so I am excited. I have 9 more to go. It's not everything but it's a good sampler of my work. If I were to do every number I ever made I would be there a week.

I did struggle after the shoot though. I haven't been happy with my performances lately and I can't figure out why I am not.  When discussing my struggle with Totalie, it was re-discovered that my original plan for Trulie was a "one and done" kind of feel. I still spend countless hours making paper dresses only to destroy them, but I was churning out a new number every show, and only doing one number per show when I first started. The idea was once I did a number I wouldn't do it again.

This became an issue when I started to get more gigs. Working full time made it very difficult to perform more than once every two weeks under these rules of mine, and producers always wanted two numbers from each performer. I let that inform my direction, and began to make numbers that used regular clothes (travels better, doesn't require build time after the initial pull) and I started to repeat numbers. (I got really fast at making certain dresses.)

I think that has lead me here to this place of me being unsatisfied. I do love these numbers, but nothing seems to compare to the feeling I have after walking offstage having performed a number for the first time. I was surprised when I realized just how much I had let others inform my direction. It's not a negative thing, I am happy to work with people, I just lost sight and that must be why I am unhappy.

I think I need to find that path again and see if I can get that feeling back.

Twitch Time

Totalie has been telling me I should have a Twitch stream for some time now, and I fought him on it until yesterday.  I decided being more open with my process would help me to grow, and of course fear is something that is worth conquering. You can find his channel here: Veetorp

We started by programming the raspberry pi for the show we have on Saturday at Ruby Tuesday Live because it was pi day so why not! We use the pi for sound and video because most of the time, we are a two person crew. It's very nice to have it for conventions and festivals.

If we are going to continue streaming...he's gonna have to clean his room....

After we went through that, Crys Darling of Label Yourself came over and she and I discussed DRAUMA. Since this year isn't a competition, and every designer has been assigned their own album, we felt more comfortable showing pieces of the looks we are creating. We wanted to show a bit of what it is like to work side by side as two designers with strong ideas (and how to work together to solve issues created by that fact ^_^ ) This episode (do they call them episodes?! I'm gonna have to learn terminology here) was more of a discussion but next time I will show more of the process. I think I will make her skirt on the stream since we talked about it.

Tomorrow Totalie and I will be making sandwiches on a new app I heard about called Nom. We started season one of The Trulie Awesome Online Show last year by making sandwiches and interviewing people, and I didn't want to continue that into season two (we have different plans for season two) but I still like sandwiches, so this app may be what I need for it.

 It's live cooking shows. I just thought it would be neat to try but I can not seem to get their tech support to respond to my email asking why "The Trulie Awesome Show" is reserved. At this point, even if we broadcast, we may not be searchable. Right now I am on there as @TrulieScrumptious but again, if you try nom.com/truliescrumptious is wont take you anywhere. I can continue the sandwich interviews recorded and edited on YouTube, but live is a bit more of what I am looking for.